Your body stores trauma in its cellular memory through Big T (major events) and Little T (ongoing stresses) experiences that manifest as chronic pain, anxiety, hypervigilance, and perfectionism—not personality flaws but nervous system responses. Learn somatic healing techniques including trauma-informed yoga, grounding methods, and therapeutic touch, plus discover the gut-brain connection for holistic recovery.
November 7, 2025
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In our country, stories are told from one generation to the next and people often show how they feel. Because of this, it's easy to think we know how our lives really went. What if, though, an unseen part of your story shapes who you are and how you act in the world? What if the deep worry you feel when plans change or the need to please everyone all the time isn't just a personality quirk but a memory of something you've forgotten? Trauma isn't just a big event, even though we talk a lot about the big, dramatic ones like crashes, loss, and abuse. It's an experience that makes it hard for us to deal with things, and it stays with us in spirit.
For millions of Indians, this is a very hard fact of life. There are beautiful threads of family, community, and tradition in our lives, but there are also threads of huge pressure, unspoken demands, and emotional burdens. It's not about who is to blame; it's a bold act of self-discovery. This piece takes you on a trip into the quiet world of trauma, which is often ignored. We'll talk about how our past, even the parts we think we've moved on from, can hold us back in ways we didn't expect. This book will help you understand what your body and mind are trying to tell you and find a new way to heal.
Imagine that your life is a long trip. Since the day you were born, you've been walking, and each time you go somewhere, you add something to the backpack you carry. Love, happiness, and laughter are light and easy to carry. But what about those times when you feel too much? When you got in trouble for crying, the constant stress of having to do well in school, or the worry that you'll let your family down? These times, big and small, are like having heavy stones thrown into your pack.
From a psychological point of view, these are what we call traumatic events. Not just memories, but also events that were too much for your nervous system and left a mark on your brain and body. In the fields of healing from trauma and understanding complicated PTSD, this idea is very important. "Big T" trauma includes one-time events that put people's lives in danger, like a terrible accident or a natural disaster. "Little T" trauma includes ongoing stresses that make us feel less safe over time. A heavy, unseen weight hangs over many of us because we are constantly criticized, emotionally ignored, or live in a high-stress family situation.
In India, "little t" traumas are very widespread and are often seen as normal. This can come in many forms, such as a parent's silent disappointment, the pressure to fit in with society's expectations, or the constant focus on doing well in school at the cost of a child's emotional health. We learn to hold back our feelings, put the needs of the group ahead of our own, and carry our responsibilities alone. Even when people mean well, this societal conditioning can leave a mark that lasts a long time.
Think about the movie Taare Zameen Par. Not only did Ishaan Awasthi have problems in school, but he also had problems with his emotions because his parents put his grades ahead of his well-being. The constant stress and lack of mental support from his father caused him a lot of harm. His temper tantrums and withdrawal were not signs of a "lazy" child; they were normal reactions to stress. What he went through is a powerful example of how Indian families' unspoken standards can hurt a child.
As another example, a news story from a few years ago talked about the scary rise in student deaths in Kota, which is the coaching capital of Rajasthan. Even though there were many things going on, the huge amount of pressure from parents and society was a big one. They weren't just failing tests; these young students felt like they had failed, were ashamed, and had no hope. This can be very upsetting. The hopes of their family were heavy on their shoulders, and when they finally gave up, terrible things happened. These events tell us that something that might seem like a normal part of life can be a source of deep, life-changing trauma for some people.
Trauma isn't just in your head. It’s stored in your body's cellular memory. Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, a leading expert on trauma, famously wrote in his book, The Body Keeps the Score, that “the body remembers what the mind tries to forget.” This is a crucial concept. Your nervous system, having been overwhelmed, goes into a state of chronic hyper-arousal or hypo-arousal, leading to a host of symptoms you might not even realize are connected to your past.
These are the ones we typically associate with trauma:
Sudden, overwhelming feelings of fear, a racing heart, and shortness of breath that seem to come from nowhere.
Reliving the traumatic event as if it's happening right now.
A persistent feeling of sadness, hopelessness, and a loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed.
Intense mood swings, angry outbursts, or an inability to control your emotions.
This is where the real work of self-discovery begins. Many people live with these symptoms for years, treating them as personality flaws or isolated health issues, unaware of their deeper origins.
Chronic Pain and Digestive Issues: Have you ever noticed that your stomach acts up when you're stressed? This isn't a coincidence. The gut is our "second brain," and chronic stress and trauma can lead to a host of digestive problems like IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). o Headaches and Muscle Tension: Your body is in a constant state of readiness for a threat, leading to persistent tension, especially in the neck, shoulders, and jaw. o Fatigue and Brain Fog: Your nervous system is in overdrive, constantly scanning for danger, which is incredibly draining. This can lead to a state of constant exhaustion and an inability to think clearly.
Hyper-vigilance: This is a hallmark of trauma. You are constantly on guard, scanning your environment for threats, and anticipating the worst. You might overreact to small things and find it difficult to relax.
Perfectionism and People-Pleasing: A need to be "perfect" and to please everyone stems from a deep-seated fear of rejection and a need to control how others perceive you. It’s a way of trying to earn the love and safety you didn't receive.
Emotional Numbness: As a defense mechanism, your mind and body might have "checked out" to avoid pain. You might feel disconnected from your emotions and others, and feel a sense of apathy toward things you once cared about.
Self-Sabotage: When you get close to a goal or a healthy relationship, you might unconsciously do something to destroy it. This often happens when you have an underlying belief that you don’t deserve good things.
These silent symptoms are your body's way of crying for help. They are the echoes of a past you think you've buried, and learning to listen to them is the first step toward true healing. The great Indian spiritual teacher, Jiddu Krishnamurti, once said, "It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." In many ways, our so-called "normal" reactions to a stressful world are simply our bodies trying to survive.
The beauty of the human body is its incredible capacity for healing. Once you understand that your trauma lives in your nervous system, you can start to use techniques that speak its language. This isn't about talking your way out of trauma; it's about moving through it. Here are some powerful, scientifically-backed ways to help your body feel safe again.
When we experience trauma, our nervous system can get "stuck" in a state of fight, flight, or freeze. This means the energy of that response is trapped inside us. Movement is a powerful way to release that trapped energy.
Unlike traditional yoga, this focuses on helping you feel safe in your body. It's not about doing a perfect pose; it's about gentle stretching and mindful breathing. It helps you reconnect with your body without judgment and can significantly reduce the physical symptoms of anxiety. A 2014 study published in the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry found that trauma-informed yoga significantly reduced symptoms of complex trauma in women, improving their emotional regulation and reducing dissociation.
You don't need a formal class. Just put on your favorite Bollywood song and move. Let your body lead. The goal is to move without a script, to let the energy flow.
The rhythmic motion of walking, combined with the grounding effect of being outdoors, can be incredibly soothing. It helps to regulate your nervous system and provides a sense of calm.
When you feel overwhelmed by a trauma response, your mind is often in the past or the future. Grounding techniques bring you back to the present moment, where you are safe.
This is a simple but powerful grounding technique.
5: Name five things you can see. o 4: Name four things you can feel. o 3: Name three things you can hear. o 2: Name two things you can smell. 1: Name one thing you can taste.
This is a psychosensory technique that involves tapping on specific meridian points on your body while repeating a phrase about your feeling. It’s a way of interrupting the brain's stress response and calming the nervous system. While there are varying degrees of effectiveness, it is a tool that many find helpful for emotional regulation. A metaanalysis published in the journal Review of General Psychology concluded that EFT is effective in treating a wide range of psychological conditions, including anxiety and post-traumatic stress.
For many who have experienced trauma, touch can be a difficult and sometimes triggering experience. However, when done with care and consent, therapeutic touch can be a profound tool for healing.
Gently massaging your own hands, feet, or neck can help to release tension and reconnect you with your body in a safe, controlled way. This is a gentle step toward re-establishing a sense of safety within yourself.
A professional massage therapist who is trained in trauma informed care can help release the chronic tension that has built up in your muscles. The physical touch can help to regulate your nervous system and release stored emotional energy.
Certain points in the body, such as the sternum (the center of your chest) and the base of your skull, are known to hold tension. Gently pressing or massaging these areas can release emotional blockages.
As we've explored, trauma is not just a mental issue; it's a physiological one. And this journey of healing has a surprising and fascinating next step. The physical symptoms we discussed—the digestive issues, the fatigue, the brain fog—are not just a coincidence. There is a profound, two-way highway between your brain and your gut, known as the gutbrain axis. Your gut is home to trillions of bacteria, and the composition of your gut microbiome has a direct impact on your mood, your stress response, and your overall mental health. When your nervous system is in a state of chronic stress, it can literally change the landscape of your gut, creating a vicious cycle of physical and emotional distress.
But here is the most hopeful part: just as your mind and body have influenced your gut, the food you eat can become a powerful tool for your healing.
In Part 2 of this blog, we will dive deep into the fascinating world of the gut-brain axis. We’ll explore: • How trauma literally affects the health of your gut.
The journey to healing is not just about therapy; it’s about a complete re-evaluation of how you live. It's about movement, mindfulness, and, as you'll discover in our next blog, it's also about what you choose to eat. Your body has carried the burden for so long; it’s time to give it the care it deserves. Are you ready to continue this journey with us?
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